Today I have done very little other than laying in bed dozing in and out of sleep... watching reruns on tv... and taking two showers even though I have yet to leave my house. I think that I am resting mentally for what will be a very trying and difficult week.

Taking my truck to the body shop in the morning for the insurance rep to assess the damage and begin the repair process. I have never been in an auto accident in my own car so I am unsure of how this process will go and exactly how long I will be without her.

I also have to fly to DC to handle some personal business on Wednesday. The person that was supposed to come through and get me a buddy pass to fly has yet to come through. So as of Sunday at 8pm... I have no clue to how I am getting there.

One of my baby cousins that I grew up closely with and his girlfriend gave birth to a premature baby girl, McKenzy about a month ago. Saturday morning I got a phone call saying that Mac didn't make it. She was too weak and too small but she tried.

My job search is in high gear, while I enjoy my coworkers and my job for the most, I am not being challenged the way I like to be and I am definitely not being paid what I need to be. Since moving to Atlanta the job thing has been the only thing I have been unable to conquer... I never had these issues back in DC. But I will keep trying.

I am so unhappy with where life is for me at this moment. I am so far off my 10 year plan... but I am working to get back on track... please no sympathy just felt like ranting a little.....

“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved.” – Helen Keller

12 comments:

life said...

First, I love the quote. Second, what did you want to accomplish in this 10 year plan you speak of? You're not doing bad at all...give yourself a break.

Anonymous said...

the thing is nothing is guaranteed, we can make our own plan but God's plan will still prevail, so don't be hard on ya self with your life’s plan not being on the mark, neither was mine but im happy with were its heading now, so u will be fine
Good seeing at the party Saturday, wasn't it crazy lol,

C. Baptiste-Williams said...

Twinston - it was crazy and hot as hell... but good times all around anyway

Life - when i graduated from college i wrote out goals for myself for the next ten years and im a little off track but will be back on it soon... just had to have a venting session to release some emotions.

Kyon Saucier said...

It is true you maybe off on your 10 yr plan and I suppose you have a right to be unhappy about that, but please don't get depressed about it. Redd you're educated, handsome, intelligent, and you have friends and family that love you. You have a job that may not be all you require it to be but it is a job. Which was if I remember from your earlier posts, something you lacked at one time.
I just think you have so many blessings in spite of what you may feel. I've read your blog and all I can say is look at what you've been through and overcome. I mean do you ever look back over your blog ever and just remember all of what you have conquered? Lesser man have crumbled under some of the circumstances you've endured and emerged stronger from. Joblessness, moving to a city where you had some economic troubles, weeding your way through folkz to find the friends you needed and having one of them robb you, all the different men you dated and all the crazieness that came from that and still you are here.
Things may be tough right now but if your blog is any indication you have the strength, will, and determination, I'm sure to beat all of this. You're not off your 10 yr plan, it just is taking a lil longer to complete that's all. My condolensces on the death of you baby cousin Mackenzie...Be blessed Reddman I know you can beat these doldrums.... And I suspect that you do as well....

C. Baptiste-Williams said...

NO MORE SYMPATHY MESSAGES I WAS JUST VENTING, WHICH WE MUST ALL DO FROM TIME TO TIME

Unknown said...

I hear you...
Good luck with the car and the trip.
Good to see that you're human pa.

Andre J. Allen II said...

through it all you will be stronger and wiser. continue to stay focus. Its seems like all the promienent bloggers are going through it will got to rally everyone and send out blessings and prayers

Mr. Jones said...

I feel left out of the 'good seeing you at _____, Reddmann' group. :-(

lol...seriously though, I'll be in the A in a couple of weeks. Maybe you can send me a list of the hot spots.

iii said...

hope those Dc plans panned out for ya.

Anonymous said...

Red

We love you. You can make it!

The finish line is fast approaching.


see you there

Darius T. Williams said...

10 year plan...ahh, I had one of those - lol. I wonder what happened.

Anonymous said...

Just let it flow bruh...