Lessons Learned in 2006


“If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant; if we did not sometimes taste of adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome. “ – Anne Bradstreet

“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved.” – Helen Keller

“The highest reward for a man’s toil is not what he gets for it, but what he becomes by it.” – John Ruskin


These daily affirmations and prayer have been the only things getting me through 2006. I came into 2006 on quite a high. A good job that afforded me national travel; other than my car note and student loans relatively no debt; good friends to enjoy travel, shopping trips, and just hanging out with; and the possibility of a romance that seemed to be on the right track.

Life is nothing but a string of decisions. Some decisions can make it better, some can keep it from growing, and others can change things for the worse. I made one decision in 2006 that seemed to take what was to be such a great year, to being the absolute worse of my adult life. However as I try to take something positive from this disastrous year, I have learned so much about myself and people around me. And these are my lessons from 2006:

The grass in Atlanta is no greener than the grass in DC. My job in DC was going just fine, but I saw an opportunity to work for the number 3 (if that) association management firm in Atlanta and jumped on it. After working for the firm less than two weeks, I was fired for what they said “wasn’t a good fit”. And that was the only explanation they gave and even had to give under the “work at will” law. So after leaving a job I was comfortable with in DC and relocating to what I thought was going to be a better life in Atlanta… left me unemployed for three months and once again back in debt. My lesson learned: Still trying to figure this one out!!

Friends come into your life for a reason, a season, and rarely a lifetime. Me and Harold had been friends for almost ten years, but me moving to Atlanta would be the first time we actually lived in the same city. He introduced me to his friends and I attempted to make my own. My first three months in Atlanta were quite difficult and depressing, and when I landed my current job it seemed as if there was finally a ray of hope. I called him to tell him things were finally turning around… to get a mild response. The weeks that followed had me feeling left out and alone. Only to get an email on his birthday saying that he can’t sustain this friendship any longer, with out any explanation. My lesson learned: The only thing in life you can count on is taxes and death. Nothing in life is forever… and don’t expect an explanation on why.

Dating is difficult and Relationships aren’t easy. One of the first people I befriended after moving to Atlanta was Kool. Kool brought two other people into my life one was Dominican and the Bee (more on him later). I actually met Scorpio before moving to Atlanta and what started off as a friendship led to dating and then… well nothing back to an awkward friendship. Dating Dominican and Scorpio was an interesting experience, of which prompted a few blog entries this year but most notably Must I Date Your Friend Too . My lesson learned: Dating is a process of weeding through people to find the right one to develop a relationship with. Patience for that right one is a virtue that I must work on.

If you are driving an X5 with no job… you are a crafty faggot. Like I mentioned above Kool brought two people into my life… the other was Bee. After numerous weeks and months of hanging out, hanging out every weekend kind of took a back seat to dates, kids, and jobs. And then my house got broken into and weeks later Kool’s house got broken into again. Long story short… the short bastard standing between us took advantage of two genuine friendships invaded our homes stole material things and left his dignity. I was always raised to do whatever you can to help friends out and if Bee ever needed anything, all he had to do was ask but instead he decided to play spades at my table, eat food I prepared, watch movies on my TV… all the while eyeing what he would be stealing later. My lesson learned: You never truly know who a person is, but always trust your gut feeling.

Lack of communication will be the death of any friendship. He is attractive, intelligent, and funny. And he was to be mine. Because of all the stress I was going through when I first moved to Atlanta… I pushed him to the side and got sidetracked. I looked for things to justify what I did but I was wrong. I fucked up something that could have been great. Looking back on it now, I don’t think either of us really worked that hard on making it the way it should have been. But I am a man and I admit my mistakes and wrongdoings. And today I sincerely apologize for my fault in this all and hope we can work on the friendship. My lesson learned: Just like a plant, friendships need nurturing as well.

2006 was one hell of a year… and I am claiming that 2007 as my rebuilding year. By the end of 2007 I want to be where I was before moving to Atlanta and back on the path to making my 10 year plan a reality. So I am leaving all of this strife, bad memories, and experiences of 2006 right here… because tomorrow as I embark on a new year and a new start.

I am hoping that each of you make your 2007 better than your 2006.



“If there is no struggle, there is no progess.” – Frederick Douglas

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow just getting in and read your blog. Yes 2006 as been a trying year. Not sure where our friendship lies right now and I know allot of things I have done has done nothing to build a stronger one. A genuine thanks to you for loving me and hating me. I do consider you a friend and I don't want that to change but I know you are tired of my excuses. Please know I have not forgotten about you and what I owe you. Please bear with me! Although we don't talk much I do think of you often. Love u Charles and Happy new Year's.
KCK

Playboy Adonis said...

Redd, keep being and doing good things for the people around you. The folks who are not "getting it" will eventually be brought to the light and be thankful for that. Although you had to lose a few items and friends in the process, at least as you move into 2007 you won't have that unnecessary baggage of being you thought were your friends.

Be patient in every area of your life and I'm saddened to hear about the job situation you encountered this past year. I only know that you sound determined to excel no matter what. So, stay motivated and know that people are wishing you nothing but the best. (and I don't even know your redd ass....LOL) But somehow I sense that you were meant for greatness.

Here's to you Redd...Keep Pushing

Valentino said...

I am awestruck about Bee and sorry to hear such things...toast to mending ur friendships in 007.

ProfessorB said...

Funny, last night I told a friend to make sure to hide valuables at home when having a party or a guest over. People like to take.

Cocoa Rican said...

Pa... no words of wisdom needed here... you seem to know wassup... do your thing in 2007... you have the right attitude and the right ideas for progress. I'm especially pleased to see that a man can stand back and say, "Hey, I f*cked up... forgive me... let's start from here..." Best of luck always... keep passin' the open windows...

Anonymous said...

omg isnt B the same person as http://sameollove.blogspot.com/ wow that is fucked up he would steal from friends... i saw him and his twin not too long ago. wow

Anonymous said...

Wow! Best post all year!!! Inspiring and poignant. Thanks for sharing and all the best in the new year!!!

-Someone who drops by your page now and then.

Kensilo said...

I am sorry to hear that your 2006 year was not what u wanted it to be but you dealt with it and survive it. Continue to strive for your goals and achievments. 2007 will be a better year. Take Care!

Dayne Avery said...

Well said! I come to your blog often but didnt know most of those things. However, all the BS aside you already passed the first hurdle- learning from the past and vowing to make things better. Here's to a great 07.

That Dude Right There said...

Damn, your 2006 was indeed quite hectic, but you made it through and partied into the New Year (yeah I saw you with drink in hand at midnight).

With ideals like yours, I wouldn't worry about 2006, but just keep those lessons in mind. As we all should do the same.

terpFAN said...

as for the move it might be too early to draw a conclusion either way … sometimes a year isn’t really a long enough measuring stick … by the end of this year you might just decide the move to ATL wasn’t so bad after all

ReddMann said...

me with a drink in my hand whatever are u talking about?!?!?!?!

and why didnt you speak if you saw me out!!!

twinston1911 said...

Charles all i can say is get ready for a wonderful blessing from God, see all that you have gone thru and learned is preparing you for what God has for you, so please be patient and keep the faith and ask God to give you strenghth to get thru the rough times. Take it from me i've gone thru alot of what u have gone thru, i had to let friends go, i was disappointed by friends, i was laid off from a good paying job and landed a low paying job,NO CAR FOR 3 YEARS, u name it, i've been thru it but God has been there for me and kept me strong, and now his blessings are really starting to increase in my life. and the same will happen for you, your blog has helped, informed, and entertained me and others and i thank you for that. so just hang in there, u are in my prayers and 2007 will be a blessin for you,

ps, i still owe u an aquarium ticket :)

That Dude Right There said...

Well maybe it was a cup of water that you had. LOL But I know that I had a Corona.

And I didn't speak because I hate trying to make people understand who I am when they have no idea who I am.

life said...

2006 is wasn't that good to you...man. However, it appears you learned a lot. I'm sure you will not repeat the same mistakes in 2007. I'm also surprised we didn't get a post from jail. Going by this blog you have a temper, but I see you took the more passive aggressive approach lol at the link with his picture..omg.

THE PISCEAN said...

twinston1911 said it all.
Man, get ready for 2007. Stay focused. You are on your way.

THE PISCEAN said...

Sorry man but I am excited about your future and I don't really know you. lol

Anonymous said...

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Much Love

P.S.- If you ever figure out who this is try not to laugh to hard!